Feature: Which of PlayStation's Lonely Hearts Are Looking for Love?

why is Squall on the list? he got the girl at the end of FFVIII

Agreed, get Squall off this list.

@FullbringIchigo @Arckadius Either it was made before he met Rinoa, or Zell made it for him anyway.

... Or Rinoa dumped him because he's an anti-social moody teen.

Bloody hell, article's meant to be a laugh, not commentary on a game's fiction.

The inclusion of Squall was very fan in my opinion. Although there was a debate back in the day on if he got the girl (if memory serves well).

@ShogunRok ...when Iron Bull goes into detail about Quanri mating practice's, not appropriate here huh

I loved Squall being on the list. That was my favorite.

Squall at the end class. But his location is the garden and his dislikes are seifer surely? And he does like fur collars and massive gunblades.

@Bad-MuthaAdebisi He probably goes over them after the first date. Anyone who sticks around gets to ride the bull.

@themcnoisy Definitely, but we went with the idea that he doesn't want to be on a dating site as it is. I bet he hates witches too, and time travel... And drawing magic from enemies! Actually, he hates quite a lot doesn't he?

"Werewolves — I can't stand bloody werewolves."

lol

I love the Squall piece in particular, but the whole thing is brilliant!

My valentine day is the best last night I got a ps4 the last of us bundle plus tomb raider,knack,watch dogs,Killzone shadow fall and a Playstation plus subscription for valentine days I got my gf a day at Dave and busters and I'm getting her a Hoodie and new shoes I have like the best gf ever.

The Ages are all messed up...

Oh man, this is pure gold. I had to stop reading it in the morning so I didn't wake someone up. Where to start, Squall's was amazing, and SirLoveALot1886 was amazing. Has anyone on this site ever held a job as a comedian?

"Push My Square" LOL!

@ShogunRok yeah I bet Zell set it up for a laugh (I know it's a joke I was just messing)

although I did notice the ratio of men to women was a bit one sided not much choice for the men on the list, guess some guys are going to be disappointed

Victor Sullivan 38 wish ? Lmao more like 48 ish.

@FullbringIchigo I know, I was just trying to diffuse any more Squall talk. It's all his fault.

And the female/male ratio was something me and @get2sammyb went over numerous times. When it came down to it, we just couldn't think of that many female characters who we could make really good jokes out of. We also tried to stay away from anyone too obvious, like Nathan Drake, Kratos, or Lara Croft.

Well done. Great article.

Also, I got dibs on Jill Valentine. I've had a thing for her since the 90's & she made the bleh RE: Revelations worth playing. 3 words: Wet. Suits. Rule.

@tonyp1987

Wow!!! Yea ya do!!! Does your gf have a sister? Lol.

@get2sammyb my gf loves me and we been together almost 4 years now and I was gonna get gta v but it was to much money but I got knack instead of gta v

@Godsire- she has to sisters but they already taken Sorry man

How deceiving of Jill to use a picture of her from 17 years ago... ^_^

Love this article! Could have used maybe someone like Trish from the original DMC for a bit of balancing, but still an enjoyable read

@ShogunRok how about

Garnet Til Alexandros: she will hit you like a "Dagger" to the Heart

or

Kari: don't worry you won't have to meet her father (it's a line from simple and clean)

or

Gaia: she will make the Earth move for you

@FullbringIchigo I especially like the garnet one!

_{Bye bye, spammer - get2sammyb}

@ShogunRok You're male/female ratio is great compared to Nintedolife though. They always do horrible at that on their version of this.

This is just the funniest thing ever Standing Ovation

Take Squall off this list. I am personally invested in Squall's love life and he should't be on this list.

Yay, Its back again. Squalls still signed up. Him and Jill_Sandwich should pair up they've both been single for a whole year.

Poor iron bull is back, he's such a sweetie too.

@get2sammyb off topic, but I have to say I'm impressed at the speed in which spammers are removed on this site. Well done to the mod team.

On topic, I'm older than Michael De Santa. That makes me sad.

There was just no way that an idea like this could actually end up being funny... Yet it totally did!

Location: Don't care
Likes: Whatever...
Dislikes: This is a waste of time…

Can't relate to half of the characters here since I've never played their games before but Squall's description is hilarious!

Where is Ellie, or Joel for that matter? They both desperately need a good...well ya know

@SonyInfinity Isn't Ellie like, 14?

@get2sammyb @SonyInfinity So... how about that Joel, eh? Phwoar. What a post-apocalyptic hunk.

@SonyInfinity @get2sammyb @TheMightyPunram I like it when he smashes someone's head in with a brick.

Chloe and crash would make a great power couple.

I exploded in laughter when I saw Crash on here. I did so again when I saw King. This feature all around is just hilarious.

Oh, Sully! He's such a cutie. lol. He's perfect, funny, and he's got such a great, laid-back attitude. I can't get over how much I love him. I thought he was older than 38 though (I bet he's lying). I would totally go for Sully

and then I scrolled down.

OMG, I love you Jill!! Argh. Now I can't decide. I'm so bad at this, I hate Valentine's Day. Maybe I'll just send both of them anonymous chocolate and daydream on the sidelines.
(T-T ) Ugh. I'm so pathetic.

btw, I didn't know Jill was 41. I guess I like them older. (^_^ )/

How about poor Chris Redfield
Age: never seems to
Hates: Jill Valentine always been picked ahead of him.
Likes: Don't know, never picked him 😃

I also have a thing for
Naked Snake, Solid Snake, Meryl Silverburgh, Impa (OoT) Sheik/Zelda, Samus Aran, Harry Mason, Bayonetta, Ryu Hayubasa, Mila (DoA), Lisa Hamilton, Sheva Allomar, Chris Redfield (and his biceps), Alucard, Decadus, Cent, Three (drakengard 3), Claire Farron, Oerba Yun Fang, Sazh Katzroy, Ignis (FFXV), Ahh! The list won't stop! Ahh!

OMG! what have you done to me @get2sammyb @ShogunRok !
(T. T )

Today is Lara Croft's birthday.

She was born Feb 14, 1968. I fired up Rise of the Tomb Raider and saw "Happy Birthday" like wtf? It's not my birthday

Triss's bio

Some of these were hilarious.

Haha, funny stuff. I wonder if King will have any luck.

@LieutenantFatman Word on the street is King has a lot of luck. Must be the tail.

This is hilarious. Bravo Push Square, bravo.

@get2sammyb Swipe to the left to dismiss Sammy. Thought you'D know that I jest. XD

Still this was a fun read, didn't know Jill would be 41. Must have those Paul McGann anti-aging 8th Doctor powers.

Valentines Day was fun. My girlfriend came down for the weekend and we played...Sly 3 and Sonic 06...

@Utena-mobile By "Cent", I can only assume that you're referring to rap artist 50 Cent's in-game avatar from the smash-hit PS2 title, Blood on the Sand.

@TheMightyPunram
lol. oh yeah, let me tell ya. *whew ( ^ .^)

but no. (--_-- )
I was talking about Drakengard 3. I have a lot more but I had to stop myself because I realized 1) no one wants to read my list, and 2) the longer it gets the more pathetic I look. (T-T )

welp, I'm off to ogle Ryu Hayubasa on Dead or Alive.

@Utena-mobile His best costume is the one where he's got nothing on except for his mask & undies. A prime example of wardrobe symmetry, that.

Holy Sh.....! XD XD

Just finished work & I see this...
Mustn't. Laugh. On. Public. Transport....

Where can I order a Jill Sandwich?

@get2sammyb Must have missed it last time around so I'm glad that you did!

So much creamy goodness in this article Spread the joy.

This feature just made my day,flippin hilarious!
But uh..how do I get in contact?They leave no way to get in contact..

@get2sammyb Oh, on the Triss ship, eh? Poor Yennifer. But I suppose Yennefer wouldn't be on a site like this as she does whatever the hell she wants.

The Fat Princess Character and Game Series are discriminatory towards weighted individuals. It's sad in this day and age when we are so sensitive to gender, race and sexual orientation that it is still acceptable to discriminate based on ones weight.

So.... where do i click to send a private message to squall? I'm tired of not celebrating Valentines, squal be my Valentine! (Forever alone) 😂😂

Why is the tiger from "Life of Black Tiger" on here?

@ShogunRok @get2sammyb It's da bomb. Great work.

Lol my work day was exhausting but you guys bought a huge grin to my face! Thank you.

"big-boned princess". lol. no joke about beefcake?.

@RedCoatKilla Being a lesbian, indian or limbless is completely different than spending ones life gorging on kfc piling on the weight. Im a chubby chaser more so than the next guy, but when the fat seeps over ones ankles (kankles) that's a line no one should cross.

Chloe from uncharted should be on this list, the girl got thrown to the curb by Nate for Elena and will be getting her own game so she deserves it.

Gotta go with Kat.

I have a soft spot for red hair and freckles...

Btw Squall's was the best, but I am not sure Zell made it, it feels more like Selphie's doing.

Easily the absolute best line in this goes to "prove youre the master of unlocking my heart"
😂😂😂
As soon as I saw Jill_Sandwich followed by that I was out 😂😂😂

Whoever wrote that joke, take a bow sir/ma'am.

Always love this feature. Squall's was great and having all of the ladies offline was a nice touch.

LOL just saw this. Triss and Squall cracked me up 😂

Hahahahhaha!

@RinCartwright @Arckadius his Frieds put him there ... didnt you check his Profile? jeez ...
@FullbringIchigo ... i thought the same ... but hey - for a 41yo chick ... not bad lol
As the bull says - let's get hammered and hit things with blunt objects - Im down haha

Lol! Thanks for bringing this back since I’ve missed it in years past.
Happy “Single Awareness Day” everyone!

This will never get old

Happy Stale Chocolates, Cheap Wine and Fake Rose Sales day!

Sackboy doesn't have genitals, don't fall for it

Hey Kat, I can tell you're a gravity shifter, because you just turned my world upside down.

They recently added a mod to fallout 4 on pc as previously Nick Valentine wasn't romancable

You know that you're ugly when someone matches you on Tinder just to say that you're ugly.

Wow i remember when this was fitst posted 3 years ago time goes by quick

We wrote this aaaages ago but I still laugh reading it. It'd be a crime not to bring it back for Valentine's day.

@Quintumply @ShogunRok can't believe Squall hasn't had a date since 2015.

@Quintumply Bloody zell.

Team Tries all the way!

This is always a classic.

I'm curious when we're going to get an updated version.

Nick Valentine.
Dislikes: holding all of your junk.....🤣🤣🤣

Squall was my first love .. 😍😍😍

The yearly tradition continues

So..... how can I get paired up with Aloy?

I really like playing games on the PlayStation. For all the time that I spent in the game worlds, I met a lot of scenarios where there was love. But, this is nothing compared to this feeling in real life.
Once my friend told me that it was time for me to find a girlfriend and build a relationship, I agreed, and he advised me on this https://topasianbrides.com/ . I was pleased with him. There I found a girl who would soon become my wife. We are very happy together, she, like me, likes to play games. And it brings us together. In general, maybe this service will help someone. I was glad to help)