Vampire Survivors is banned in at least 12 countries. Not really, of course, but it should be – this plucky pixel art auto-battler is digital crack in its most distilled form, and those who’ve played it on the hundreds of platforms it’s already available for will know what we mean. This PS5 and PS4 version harbours no real surprises: it runs cleanly on Sony’s console and is available alongside all of its DLC at launch – including that Contra pack with its sweet sawtooth soundtrack.

The game boils down to this: you select a hero augmented with a unique spectrum of statistics and must weave between waves of mythical foes, spanning reanimated skeletons through to the ferocious fauna from the Day of the Triffids. Your character will attack automatically, so you only need to operate the analogue stick. Enemies will drop gems which, when collected, will contribute towards your level. Each level will award you with a new weapon or upgrade.

And that’s the game: a meticulously executed blend of avoidance and action, diluted into 10 to 30 minute runs (if you’re good). The longer you survive, the stronger you’ll get – but the greater the dangers will become. It’s all about building your character optimally, utilising space effectively, and watching the numbers go up. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll curse – but the minutes will turn into hours and you’ll still be muttering to yourself, “Just one more go!”

Unlockable maps add variety, permanent upgrades can be purchased with the in-game cash you collect, and there’s even a seemingly endless list of in-game achievements which unlock new weapons, characters, and content. These perfectly double as Trophies to add an extra layer of incentive over the other versions available.

Vampire Survivors, then – it’s f**cking brilliant and it costs less than a coffee. Get it fed into your eyeballs fast!